Counseling Recommended

“I’ve just come out of a bad relationship and I’m wondering if it’s too early to start dating again?”

 “I was sexually abused as a child . . . and I didn’t realize until recently how much it affects my life. Do you have any advice?”

 “My boyfriend pressured me to have sex with him and now I regret it, but don’t know how to tell him I want to stop without losing him. What should I do?”

Over the last year and a half of blogging, I’ve received many questions like this that absolutely break my heart. You’ve shared stories of abuse, broken relationships, heartbreak, depression, and I love that you feel safe enough to share your questions and struggles with me. What a true gift you are to me.

I honestly wish that I could see each of you weekly and walk through these difficult situations alongside you—but many times we bump up against hardship in life where seeing a trained professional is necessary.  The reason I am where I am today and have found healing is by doing hours, weeks, months, and years of counseling—because at different points in my life, I needed someone to help me understand myself better and walk me through difficult situations. Will you consider seeking professional help?

If you are engaged to be married, struggling with an addiction, anxiety-ridden, fighting with your spouse, in broken family relationships, have been in an abusive relationship, or struggle with depression or thoughts of suicide—the absolute best thing you can do is see someone weekly to help you. The good news is I have the perfect person for you—my friend, Meg Kandros. She’s experienced in all of these areas and has her own private practice here in Nashville.

I’m recommending Meg because it’s so important to feel like the person you’re sharing your heart with “gets you”, isn’t it? She’s young and passionate about helping women hold onto hope in every circumstance. Michael works closely with Meg’s husband at church and I was honestly a little jealous of her job the first time I met her. She and I have similar passions—sharing truth with compassion into the lives of hurting women. Except she gets to go deeper than I ever can!

Before getting her masters in marriage and family therapy at Trevecca University, Meg Kandros worked for three years at the Hope Clinic where she served women facing the challenges of unplanned pregnancy and assisted them in making healthy life choices. Her experience in private practice includes helping singles and married couples work through anxiety, unhealthy relationships (whether opposite sex, family or friends), childhood trauma, shame, boundaries, troubled marriages, and pre-marital counseling. Many of the topics I talk about here on the blog.

I saw counselor when I was completely unglued and when I just needed someone to help me navigate some questions about marriage—so I want you to know help should not be reserved for just when you’ve crashed face first into depression or after you’ve quit your job or haven’t left your house for a week. Michael and I went through extensive pre-marital counseling and actually have someone on call whenever we need a little extra help talking through something. It is one of the absolute BEST ways you can love yourself well—and invest in your future.

So here’s my challenge to you today: invest in yourself and your future. If you are in a difficult situation and don’t know where to turn, try setting up a 15 minute free consultation with Meg. I seriously cannot recommend her enough!

And keep your questions coming—I absolutely love the emails! Let’s just make a deal that you’ll seek professional help when needed so I don’t have to worry about you too much, ok?

Counselor in NashvilleMeg Kandros, MMFT
[email protected]
Private practice office is located in Green Hills (Nashville, Tennessee)


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11 Responses to “Counseling Recommended”
  1. Jessica says:

    Love this. People need to know that it is ok to seek counseling. That you don’t have to be strong enough to work it out on your own. Many employers offer free counseling through programs such as MHN, I used this for a short time when I had reached a point that I just couldn’t handle the stress in my life, I was having mini anxiety attacks and was in tears on bosses office. They kindly and off the record suggested I use the option to lessen the burden. It was great. Also joining a small/home group at church helps, it brings you a small group of people that you can trust and that wil give you words of gods love and wisdom from their experiences!!

    • Ruthie Dean says:

      Hi Jessica. Amen, I wish more people knew it was ok to ask for help. Hopefully, my post helped some women know it’s ok!

  2. Samantha says:

    I always love reading your posts. Thank you for this blog :)

    I have a question: How would you suggest getting a friend to think about seeing a counselor? One of my friends has been having a very rough time the past few months, struggling with boys, alcohol, and not valuing herself at all. I’ve tried to help and be supportive, and tried to show her that as a daughter of God, she deserves so much more than what she is doing to herself. I know there are deeper reasons for why she’s doing what she’s doing, and why she feels the way she does- and since she won’t work it out with me, I think a counselor could really help her. But she’s in denial that the way she treats herself is unhealthy.

    Any thoughts on how to tactfully and loving bring this up?

    Thanks so much

    • Ruthie Dean says:

      Hi Sam,

      Oh wow. That is a good question. Maybe you could send her this post/my blog and then maybe sit down with her and just ask her if she’d mind if you shared some concerns. If you speak the truth in love, and give her specific examples of how her actions concern you, I would hope she’d listen. She may not, but these conversations are necessary. I wish more people would have approached me with concern when I was in high school especially instead of just being worried about my response.

      A good first line might be something about how you dealt with something hard at one point/or didn’t respect yourself/or share something you can relate to! Before you know it, you’ll be talking about her.

      Let me know how it goes, ok?


  3. Mikaela says:

    Meg sounds so wonderful! I’m definitely recommending her to my sorority.

  4. Sarah S. says:

    Ah, Ruthie. You’ve done it again. Read my mind and spoke to me exactly where I needed a gentle kick of truth. I’m going to have to give Meg a call.

  5. Ryan says:

    Counseling is SOOOOOO important. Thanks for writing this post and for recommending someone here in Nashville. What would we do without you, Ruthie?!?!?!?

  6. Danelle says:

    I needed to read this Ruthie. I am a mentor to a few young girls and I forget that I too need mentoring ( which I’ve sought as of late and my soul is being fed again after so long) professional help is definitely the best answer to serious heart issues. I’m not schooled in counseling so I should probably refer some of my girls to “professionals”. It’s protects me too, ya know? I hope women will not be ashamed or afraid to seek real help. Thank u for reminding me of that!

    • Ruthie Dean says:

      Hi Danelle,

      Hope you are well! Thanks, as always, for commenting. I hope you are able to talk to your friends about counseling-because it really is so important for the deeper, harder issues. I’m so glad I was able to recommend Meg!

      Merry Christmas!!

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